Bridal Commercials Suck

Just had to throw that out there as we're sitting here after dinner, getting caught up on "Kendra: True Hollywood Story." (P.S. After watching Kendra throw whole potatoes into the slow cooker, we realized that we "one-upped" her in the cooking department. The score currently stands at Broke 'n Single: 1, Kendra: 8,253.)

After debating what size wedding dress we would need after the whole stick of butter, the pasta, and the 3-inch thick pieces of garlic bread, we decided that ice cream would go well with wine. After all, we did have snow peas and capers.

And now that "Tiger Woods: True Hollywood Story" is on, we decided to rethink the whole marriage thing. In addition, we decided to review our latest attempt to end our adventures in singledom by inviting two seemingly attractive and somewhat successful (and by "successful" we mean gainfully employed and maintaining a household away from their parents) young men for dinner. We put our post-graduate training to work and made a "pros/cons" list to evaluate our most recent foray into the dating world:

Pros:

• Cooking, eating, and cleaning up an amazing dinner of grilled chicken topped with goat cheese, sun-dried tomatoes, and a lemon-butter sauce; roasted asparagus; rice with almonds; and (of course) bread
• Drinking four deliciously cheap bottles of wine
• Playing a rousing game of UNO

Cons (these apply most specifically to our male guests):

• Gargling whiskey
• Watching television with pants around the ankles
• Requesting empty cups for their chew-spit
• Insulting just about every group of people living on the planet today using profanity and racial/sexual/etc. epithets
• Getting too inebriated to safely make it home
• Cheating at UNO
• And, most shockingly, refusing to take pictures

Maybe we should open another bottle...